Yes, you do have to go outside to places where the real living people are.

No matter how much you appreciate your home. As long as you want to find someone you HAVE to LEAVE your home. I mean it literally: Leave = Go away = Spend your time somewhere else = Abandon your lazy bed = Do not watch your TV = Try something new.

Now this seems so obvious that nobody would ever call this an advice, but remember you can have a lifestyle where you spend most of time without any girls around (like a crane driver going straight home after work). You have to go where people are. You have to make friends, who introduce you to new friends. In other words: No dream woman will ever fly into your kitchen thru the window just because you suffer.

Do you know someone who has spent some time in a foreign country? Even if it was only for a month most of them will agree that it has been a valuable experience with a lot of impressions and probably many changes of attitudes. So even if you're not leaving the country: Change your position.

Since I think I made myself clear in the advice Leave your home, we come to step #2: Increase the chance to find a woman.

How can you do that? By going to typical "female" places!
In other words: If you go to places with more women than men then you have more chances. This may sound logical but men (including you) usually don't go to "female" places.

The following places are typical meeting places with many girls or where girls outnumber the boys

• Single clubs. Dating groups.
• Aerobic classes (many women!)
• Fitness studios. Fitness studios are actually a "triple feature"
  • In Fitness Clubs are more women than men
  • You will increase also your own body fitness
  • You may meet women who want to get in shape because they want to find a boy-friend themselves
• Dancing schools, e.g. Samba, Hip Hop etc (remember, woman LOVE a good dancer).
• Adult evening classes
• Pottery classes
• Ballet schools (Oh, well, I don't really expect you to become a ballet dancer, but there are many long-legged girls there)
• Universities with many "female" subjects as "languages", "sociology", "psychology"...
• Libraries. You can start to chat with a woman when she's having a break.
• Quiet bars (instead of loud discotheques).
• VIP rooms in discotheques. If a famous DJ puts on the music then there are sometimes groupies. Since not every of them can get the DJ, maybe they will date you. VIP rooms are also quiet places, thus good for conversations.
• Coffee shops. Woman like to sit and drink tea in a relaxed atmosphere. If you go during rush hours you are "forced" to sit next to a girl.
• Places where people go after work. These can be special bars where a lot of exhausted women are, wanting to relax and open to light conversation.
• Tourist places. If you live in a town with many tourists then you may consider visiting typical tourist places. Many female tourists are looking for a boy-friend. If they had one you would see them most probably hanging around together (since they are on holidays).
• Supermarkets/Market places. This is a good place, since many women go food shopping. There are even some "local rules" as: "Singles meet on Friday at the frozen food section". You should check in the internet or at single clubs what is considered as a "rule".
  You can even get a conversation up and going by starting to talk about food or recipes.
• ...

You get the idea.

Moreover: If you don't find somebody after joining, say, a pottery class, then you have at least some experience in pottery :-)

It could very well be that your own life schedule prohibits to meet women. If you are a "night man" then try to seek for a woman during the day and vice versa.

It could be that the changing of "standard procedures" alone can "open you up" for something new.

You have to spray on every wall, that you are a single and are looking for a girl-friend. Thanks to the internet this is a no-brainer. Here are a few examples what you can do to expose you as a single:

• Install ICQ (or other instant messaging clients). Type in all your personal data, interests etc and try to meet similar people. As I wrote in Meet Boys, your target should not necessarily be "females" but also males, who can introduce you to others.
• Join as many online dating agencies (= personals networks) as possible. Publish your photo in every of them. 1 photo says more than 1000 words.
• Make a website regarding your hobby (or regarding whatever). Nearly every software you need (for your PC and online) to start a webpage is free. Post your photo on your website and describe yourself. You can post the URL of your website in every of the dating networks. Please also read Use business cards and Know who you are.

• Look into her eyes a bit longer than you usually do
• Communicate your self-confidence by "eye signals"
• Communicate your willingness to date her by "eye signals"
• Communicate some "fun factors" (= how much fun you could have together) by "eye signals"

Don't be too shy. If you are even too shy to look then you need to change your attitude fast, because this eye2eye technique is merely THINKING while looking. There is no sense in being too shy to look.

Consider the eye-to-eye signals as the first step of dating/mating. If you receive a "No go eye answer" then try it with someone else.

Basically this is another Make yourself known rule: Let the girl know that you are ready, able and willing. It's just communicating a big "YES" without words.

Please also read She thinks you communicate like her.

IF A GIRL LOOKS AT YOU DON'T LOOK AWAY.

And let me repeat the same things as in Eye-to-eye telepathy:

• Look into her eyes a bit longer than you usually do
• Communicate your self-confidence by "eye signals"
• Communicate your willingness to date her by "eye signals"
• Communicate some "fun factors" (= how much fun you could have together) by "eye signals"

Don't be too shy. Consider it as a first time a girl is testing you whether you want to date her or not.

You have to make yourself publicly contactable/available wherever you go. It is wrong to go to a club and then sit down in some dark corner where others cannot even SEE you. It's also wrong to stand quietly around and lean against a wall while reading something. NOBODY will ever start to (eye-)contact you if you do it like this. You have to place yourself where others are and show that you are contactable. As simple as that.

The "perfect partner" is a lie which is fed by love songs, soap operas, fairy tales and lonely mothers. The "bodily perfect" partner is a lie by Hollywood and the fashion industry. Just check my website OnMouseOver Shock to see some examples.

It can become a kind of "religious habit" to not date a girl just because she seems "imperfect". Or to date a girl and match her against your envisioned perfect lover. It is just unfair. In reality EVERYBODY has flaws and thus cannot be perfect. A really perfect partner would be so perfect it wouldn't be a partner anymore but an omniscient god.

Don't believe "voices" in your head telling you "There must be someone just for me somewhere" or "I have to find the perfect partner" or "I believe there is something as perfect love". Those "voices" are traps that make your life harder. In other words: You can't be sure whether those voices are liars or not.

Let me suggest to you what is much better than an "imaginary" perfect partner: A real partner who is good. Yes, just good and real and voluntarily loving you. Let him have his flaws and he lets you have yours. The bigger the common ground the better, of course, but trying to form him into a some kind of god/goddess is unrealistic. Thus instead of for a perfect partner, strive for one who is good enough.

Matching your current partner against Ben or Pamela is silly because in 99% of the cases you won't meet them at all and in 99% of the cases they differ from the picture they present on TV. And very often they had some plastic surgery done to seduce guys like you.

OK, here's my tip: Instead of wanting to be together with your favourite celebrity try to become a celebrity yourself. This gives you way more chances to meet them and it's also fair to them :-)

• Going to the toilet with other persons of the same sex - women or men?
• Kissing other persons of the same sex without being gay - women or men?
• Studying mathematics/computer science/physics - women or men?
• Studying languages/sociology/nursing - women or men?
• Going out with handbag full of "stuff" to stay attractive - women or men?
• Brushing hair before bed - women or men? 
• Repairing cars/houses/computers - women or men?
• Feeling embarrassed if another person of the same sex wears the same clothes on a party  - women or men?

Now, why do I list these examples? To show that women ARE different than men. And also to show that YOU (as a man or as a woman) will hardly adopt some of the habits/characteristics of the opposite sex. Thus the perfect partner can only be as perfect as you are willing to love something that is different than YOU including your partner's  flaws (or what you categorize as flaws).

How could you ever know what "perfect" is, unless you tried something "imperfect"? Let's put it this way: What is the difference between theory and practice? In theory there is no difference. In reality there is.
Thus: What you might consider as perfect without trying anything out, might be very well totally unsatisfying.
I am not going to extremes here by saying you should date at least 100 women before you know what you want. But there may be some truth in it.

Maybe you think that your current partner #3 is perfect while it is (the future) partner #7?

You like "Alien vs. Predator", your partner likes "Titanic". So what?
You like "Britney Spears", your partner likes "Christina Aguilera". So what?
You like "Pizza Hut", your partner likes "McDonald's". So what?
These differing attitudes should not matter. Better prepare yourself for a perfect partner who DIFFERS but is basically similar/matching. You will differ anyway in some points. It's up to you what level of difference you may tolerate.

You should worry more about a differing style regarding child raising. Or whether your partner is a wanted criminal. Or about your partner's attitude to "free love" (= sexual affairs with other persons). Not about Pizza Hut.

Words like "forever" are spread thruout love songs as if they were propaganda. These words are not romantic, if you think about it. Is a "life sentence" romantic?
For your own peace of mind: Do not use words like "forever" or "eternal" in any of your relationships. Maybe I sound too philosophical here, but nothing is forever, thus you'd introduce a lie into your partnership and you'd probably break your own "eternal" word by leaving your partner.

Also the concept of "Till death do us part" is another factor in this misconception of relationships. It can even make you wish that your partner "should die" to stop this oath. Have you ever seen old couples who hate each other? Unspoken or outspoken? Is this the life you want to live just for the sake of "Only Mr. Death has the power to decide when to stop our relationship"?

In our fast changing times it is very uncommon to meet a partner and stay with him for the rest of the life. Thus we can safely assume that it is not unusual if your partner will NOT be the last or probably will be not the best of all possible partners.
How about making your goal to stay with your partner, say, 2 years? You can always re-decide to stay longer. But by making unrealistic goals like "We will stay together until we die = for the next 57 years" makes you run directly into a failure. And why should you fail totally unnecessary?

Are you religious and do you believe that every marriage is for eternity? I don't have any real argument against this, since one cannot argue very well with beliefs. But if you believe in eternal love, you might as well believe that "suffering in marriage is god's test". I don't know why god should test us via marital troubles, but maybe this explains why god isn't married.

The same applies to women: Instead of looking for a great husband just become a great wife yourself.

• This may loosen the "fixation" on "the other sex"
• It makes you feel good and valuable.
• It will probably give you a new slant on life.
• Maybe you will meet a female co-volunteer (the women in helping professions usually outnumber the men, thus your chances are higher)
• Maybe you will meet a woman whom you have helped
• You have a lot to talk about
• Women will appreciate your "helping attitude"

For 2 humans to fit together for a long time it is best to have similar attitudes + similar efforts + areas where both individuals complement each other.

The end result for atoms is "stones, planets and star clusters". The desired result for human relationships is happiness, games, creation and experience. And this differs totally from being a stone.

To cut a long story short: Don't be fooled by this saying. Search for a partner who is similar and not opposite. Do not try a dating strategy by being as differing as possible. Don't disagree bluntly with your talking partner during a date. If you agree then show it.

You can even dress similarly. She wears jeans and T-shirts? You could wear them, too. If you want you can subtly copy her communication style: Her vocabulary, her mannerisms, her gestures and reactions. But don't overdo it.

This attraction is very strong and I don't know what I write this here for, since you won't listen to me anyway when it hit you   :)
However there is a warning to show you that love at first sight might be the wrong thing to wait for: It seems that this attraction usually occurs when both are in the exact same emotional mood. Let me specify: If PersonA is angry in this very moment (because he just lost 10$) and he sees PersonB who is USUALLY angry (= all of the time)  then both "universes may merge" although both persons won't fit in the long run.

There are different "fittings"

• Intellectual attraction
  You vote for the same political party, you read the same books.
• Esthetics/Art attraction
  You share the same taste of music, you like to go to the theatre, you like the same kind of furniture
• Sexual attraction
  You waaant to have sex with each other.
• Experience attraction
  You just feel that the other person has the same level of experience/life wisdom.
  You survived a dangerous car accident, she survived a dangerous car accident.
  You suffered because of loneliness, she suffered because of loneliness.
  Now there is an "experience affinity".
• Age attraction
  Have you ever wondered why old people don't like to date teenies? And why teenies don't like old people? Let's take a man at age 45. He will not automatically be fond of teens. He will prefer women around his age. Yes, of course there are BOYs who like grannies and vice versa. But normally the "ideal picture of a partner's body" CHANGES with age. You as a man suddenly start to like women with wrinkles the older you get.
• Empathic attraction
  You understand each other's feelings without words. You can duplicate why the other "reacted how he reacted". You can feel each other from a distance.
• Input-Output attraction
  You have matching amounts of input (impressions) every day. You have matching amounts of talkativeness. You could talk/listen for hours.
• Intelligence attraction
  You react with the same speed. Somebody tells a joke and you start to laugh in the same second. In talks nobody has to wait for the other to understand.
• Genetical attraction
  Your bodies match. You like each other's smell. You will have healthy children.
• Outfit attraction/Beauty attraction
  You think the other one is pretty. 
• Bacteria attraction
  You have the same diseases and infections.

You can find more attractions than those above, but I want to make a point here: One single of those attractions can be so strong that you may lose the whole picture (= the importance of the other attractions). In a long lasting relationship some of initially strong attractions may become less important while some other may become impertinent. Usually at the beginning of a relationship the sexual attraction is strong. When it cools down (after 1 month or 1 year or so) then you'd better have another strong attraction running. Otherwise you may lose the interest in each other.